Just when I thought the magic had passed, it returned.
Just when I was ready to live in the memory, and appreciate what was, more amazing miracles came swimming by.
I ask for signs in all that I do. I pray for guidance, for wisdom and for clarity and I wait for the signs to guide me.
On New Years Eve, as my family and I headed to the beach, I prayed for guidance to bring me into the New Year with greater clarity. I asked about the parts of my life where there seems to be quite a bit of lack. What is the truth? Should I give up or keep the faith?
I asked very loud and clearly in my mind, “Thank you for a sign to me in the next 24 hours.”
Then I did my best to let go and to relax and enjoy the day with my daughters, Lolo, Grace, and Amber and Lolo’s boyfriend, Patrick.
What a blessing to be together, and to be able to relax on the beach, enjoying the setting sun, looking back at all we learned in 2013. We contemplated what 2013 meant for each of us and released burdensome thoughts and old energy into the water.
The gray day challenged us to know when and where the sun would set, and so we came upon the idea of driving to the Atlantic in the wee hours of the morning to see the sun rise. What a grand idea, we all agreed, to have the sun set on 2013 here on the Gulf and then to greet 2014 with the rising sun over the ocean.
With that decision we knew we would not stay too late after sunset, so as to get some sleep before a very early drive to the other side of Florida. As we looked out over the gray water, trying to ascertain if the sun was even still in the sky behind the gray clouds, Grace spotted the dolphin.
Every one of us let out an “aaaahhh…” as we watched the dolphin surface.
Then a second joined the first and they entertained us, then swam off together, traveling from North to South.
Several more came and swam past us. Just when we were straining our eyes to see down the coast, another would appear traveling before us. We watched in amazement as they kept coming. Again and again more dolphin, just when we thought they had all passed by.
Then we sat and discussed the magic of seeing them. We relived every precious moment from the moment we first saw them, to their playful dance, to the last glimmer of a fin before we could no longer trace them in the water.
The water was calm now, with no dolphin in sight, so we discussed leaving.
Just when we were about to leave, another dolphin appeared. And again a second dolphin came to swim alongside the first.
We watched once again and again we could not help but let out audible ‘awww’s’ with each breath of the dolphin.
Each time they appeared was just as magical as the first time. Again we watched until they were so far south that we could not discern the dolphin from a wave.
Again we discussed how amazing to see so many in one afternoon.
After a good 20 to 30 minutes of recounting the joys of the day we once again prepared to leave.
And again, just when we thought the magic was over, they were back again.
And again they swam from north to south, two at a time, coming up together, taking a breath, and disappearing under the gray water, together.
Up and down, up and down, and side by side, elegant, peaceful, calm and amazing.
We sat contentedly, again, in the memory after they were out of our sight. We laughed out loud in amazement that this magic kept returning.
The sky was getting dark and my family was getting cold, so once again we discussed heading home. We had a long drive home and would need to get some sleep before our morning journey.
Everyone but I was packing.
Inside me came a tug on my heart and a voice that said, “Stay.”
I looked out at the sea and listened some more.
“Wait…” the voice tells me.
I know it isn’t over.
And I know everyone else wants to go. Everyone else is ready to go.
Softly I tell my family, “The dolphin say to stay. They are telling me to wait.” And then I say even more softly, “But we can go if you want.”
My children laugh at my attempt to be true to my heart’s desire and to their needs at the same time.
They honor me by sitting down on the sandy blankets and getting comfortable once again.
As my children let go and surrender to what I think I heard, I doubt. What if I was wrong? What if it was just wishful hearing? Maybe it is over.
I am unsure and nervous. As my insecurities take over the sky darkens.
I take a deep breath and choose to believe.
And then they came. Again.
This time I was the first to see them. Side by side two come gracefully to the surface. And again, from north to south they travel before us.
This time I was so happy to see them I jumped up and ran to the water. I quickly grabbed the cuff of my jeans and pulled them up over my knees. The water is cold but I want to get as close as I possibly can.
And I watched them, thanked them and marveled at them until they were far, far away.
As we drove home in the dark I looked out at the highway signs and remembered my prayer.
For a split second I wonder, “Did I get a sign today?”
My guides laugh with me as I realize the truth.
The magic moments come when you are just about ready to give up.
So wait, just a little longer. Wait for the magic.
The magic will return again and again and again.
In Love and Faith,